Hi July

Hi.
How are you?

I apologize before for everytime I made you feel nasty of everything about me. About me. Yes there's nothing left important to you about me. You gone and live happily in peace. But the deals work in the other hand in me. Awkward and absurd. Thanks. You did your best. Even while I was writing my words, I still kept running for the reality. The reality that I kept secretly in the silence of my untold and unseen and unreasonable passion. I think you know who I mean if you are truly smart enough as I used to know.

I'm going to start with the smallest fucking damage in me. I miss you. Sorry to say, I really hate it. Yes it ain't any of your business or problem actually. I had done anything to re-health my mind but thousands sorry, I failed. Well, you can imagine how sick I am right now. Let's laugh out loud. Shout at me hey you fool bitch go to the hell. Then, I will laugh with you.

It was a long long story. Too boring to you and too painful to me. For God sake, I'm so tired of my life. You ain't the only problem God has given to me. I give up to be blunt. I give up for everything which I damn don't wanna tell you. If I'm strong enough, I will keep it forever. I ate cigar and drink chivas, to push you from my head. I succeed. But hell, in my solitude late night, you always comeback. Fuck you. Fuck you!

As you said, I am just secondhand, dirty and far from your love affair. Honestly, you too. So naive, unemphatic and far from my type. But I stuck on you. Ass! You gone but your shadow still haunted me as long as I keep it. Let me hope, if this swine letter finish, I get my freedom. I am too tired and sick. I wanna be normal again like long time ago before our first meeting in the first day in college. You sat on the terrace of Building I and belonged with your cigar. I loved it. You look so pretty, dear. Well, I think you don't have same memories. Because, you treated me like a bitch in the first till the end. But I like your honesty. Oh ya, that's why I never belong to any guy, until now. Until I find another you who will just kill me instantly, not like you did.

I know you belong to someone. And you never see me cry of it, but I still receive it. I pray to God to erase the scenes where you live everlasting in my head but God give me the worst. You shouldn't feel the same and yeah I'll take all of your nastiness. Listen. I want to feel free and relive. Enough. I just want you to know the truth. I don't care of your response. I passed the late year with no soul. I play riddle and puzzle and throw em into the trash because they just make me morbid. I hope you find your joy with a sweet lovely girl soon.

Thanks for reading.

Love you
Bitch